Back! =p

Back after such a long hiatus.. ohisashiburi desu ne..

Well..... wad has changed between then and now.. MANY... This post is gonna be just random tots... n ramblings.... just for me to look back one day and know THIS state of my life =p

 

For one, I just received my intermediate certificate upon completing Intermediate classes tonight...  Wee~~~ Omedetou Nata! after getting stuck for sooo long in the so called "Intermediate" level from one school another, finally, I, am, me, is now graduated from Intermediate... wohoOO~

 

Ok.. something "important" to me now, is the JLPT... pple has been asking me why i am taking the JLPT.. truthfully, I just wanna gauge myself on the Japanese knowledge (since i do enjoy watching dorama anyway), but upon taking classes and learning the language further, no doubt it's getting more and more tangled up and confusing,..... but it does get interesting too!! 

Apart from, of course, getting more acquaintances, sharing stories and finally making new friends, we can now, speak daily routines in Japanese.. YATTO! Speaking with teachers in limited and stuttered in Japanese and enjoying the feeling afterwards, like 'Omigosh Sensei actually understood?' XD or when listening to Sensei/ video/ even dorama! n kinda pick up what you've learnt in class...... gees... love it!

 

Next, Ive been going out more often with this person.. who shared many similar tots n we kinda achieved some level of understanding about our state of life (live?, whichever) XD... well, maybe just wanna say that... u know that time flies when you are enjoying the time? XD (our meetups tend to stretch to almost midnights O_O) but yup love hanging out with ya!! Like it when someone really shares their tots and advising you, in exchange of being the listener and you gota think of what to say.... and u r usually caught in between "advising properly" or "Cushioning the effect" or "Just say wad you think is right but offend the person allover"-kind of thing... Well.. this person is someone fresh who say wads in the mind and not just following your leads... not listening to what you said and then agreeing to what u've said (just bootlicking you... geez.. i hate bootlickers...) ok anyway.. we do have different views and point of views, but of course I have high respect for this person bhow... So, there are times that we agree to "Disagree" and we keep it that way XD. Another thing is, talking with this person keeps me +ve (From attitude wise, knowledge wise, they're +ve thinking...)... it's not those type of conversations that makes you wonder "why u even bother to waste ur time listening to (or even tangled in) the conversation in the first place".... On the contrary, it helps to open my narrow-mindedness a little wider....

 

Next, have been feeling suffocated lately.. yup, the haze!! O_o and of course, other stuffs clouding this mind O_O... not planning to say wad those are, sorry.. =p but yup, I believe everyone has their "worries" and "troubles" enough for the person to shoulder it... So, yupz, jalanin ajah =)

 

 alritey.. wad else shld i talk abt... hm.. I have been thinking that I have been making the wrong steps here and there... and now,as I have left my footprints everywhere, it's harder to just erase things.. even if you wanna runaway from that place.. There are nice days where the footprints are appreciated and celebrated, but there are days where the footprints just created damage... So, my advise to others, dont sink ur feet on sinking sands.. just test the water, dont leave any prints, just tip toe safely to the other end of the road... =)

 

Well.. some encouragement that I got from my drama addiction, Sungkyukwan Scandal ^^ the main character said something super brilliant as always... "If you need a miracle, dont wait for it to happen, create it!" something along that line... =) No way sulking and waiting will change anything...! So, yup, hav been trying to pull my sleeves up and work on it... *Ganbarimasu!*.....!!

 

Nao... it's 2.30am O_o and im still not sleeping why? coz i just finished Sungkyukwan scandal 19 and I need some "distraction" to keep me continuing watching epi 20 WITHOUT subtitles and finally spoiling the drama mood when the subs it out... geez.. this drama is really good okay! I have been "violating" my own habbit when watching this O_o... for one, I continued watching the drama until abt 3am in the morning during the "first few episodes" marathon O_o, secondly, i have been watching the "next episode preview", which is usually after the ending song is played... and satisfied my curiosity for the next epi..... thirdly.... yes, i have been watching the dramas RAW o_O Just cant be patient enuf to wait for the subs! albeit the very nice and efficient subber (soompi) releasing the subs within 1 week.... *Hugs Soompi* u have been keeping me sane these days!! 

Something more interesting... someone was saying that the candle of faith is loosing its glow... n it does struck me..... wad abt mine? where has it gone to... n how bright does it glow? 

Sadly, without the need of further examination, I know exactly how is its state... it's no better than the other person's is... Spiritual crisis! I have been told since young, that spiritual crisis comes in all kind of attacks.. and it attacks the young, old, strong, weak, man, women, basically everyone.... Spiritual crisis, if left untreated will lead to further damage to the heart, mind and soul................

So what caused the spiritual crisis? sometimes it's doubt... sometimes it's friends/ environment surrounding you, sometimes it's your own conscience.... and all that, will lead to the same ending..... great damage.. Permanent damage in hell O_o

 

Yup, very dangerous and scary thoughts.. but it's true O_o... My case and the friend I spoke abt, is the same... it's consciousness state of mind... when you get more knowledgeable about things and become more "logical" or using ur "rationale" more, those fair-coloured thing like "Faith" and "God's will" don't automatically come in to the picture... and the more you think about things that happen in your life, you question "Why"... and the more you question "Why", the colour of Faith fades.........

I dont know if this is appropriate to address the "why"-ness about faith.... pple say u r who you are... pple say you are what you read.... pple say you are who your family is... pple say you are who your influencers are.... There should come to a point in life.. that you know, what is, what is not, what will, what will not, what could, what could not... and once you sort things out, u know will see where the road of faith leads to..

Ok... sleepy nao... O_o nitey for now... maybe i should update often O_o....