sunday's thoughts...

hmm.. i juz got back from the church... itz a mission sunday.. so we hav a speaker who preached a 'light' topic on christianity, this is basically to evangelized the 'invited-by-church-member' who are non-christians... somehow each mission sunday, im slapped by their words... itz ME who've alwiz said 'im gona do the work of God.. from this week onwards...' but never seem to even CARE to hav some STEADY quiet time with Him...

hmm.. letz talk about the sermon first.. it was taken from John 10 :1-11.. about the good shepherd and his flocks... true christians would have 3 marks... that good shepherds do not RULE.. he develops relationship with the 'flock', by calling the flocks their names (1)... the flocks, on the other hand, FOLLOW Him due to glad surrender, not autonomy... '...and his sheep follow him because they know his voice..' (the sheep trusted him)(2)... 3rdly, good shepherd lays down his life for the sheep.... this IS the forgiveness from God the heavenly father to us, THROUGH the crucifiction of Christ.. (3).....

when the preacher, rev John Chapman asked.. do YOU develop any friendship with God the heavenly father?? my answer is.... 'do i?' it IS really THAT fragile! i do believe in God, believe he'll help me through my ups and downs... but WHAT is our relationship?? its like HE has been the one giving, n im not giving anything back to him... rev John said 'either u DO or u DON'T' itz juz like when u are asked 'are you married?' u cannot say 'i guess so...?' because THAT time when u decide to hav that frenship with God, itz ur CONSCIOUS mind!! so why is it i duno how to answer???!!!!! he also asked us to imagine if the judgement day comes... would Jesus be saying 'heiii!!! there u are.. my old fren...' (like when u arrived at the airport n some old frenz welcome you n hug u.... the feeling of THAT bond.. n recognition...... imagine it)... or will He be saying 'im not quite sure we've known each other b4....' itz like u r STABBED.......

2ndly, we, as christians, should follow Him gladly.. not obediently... as in.. we FOLLOW Him becoz we KNOW that he's the only one can be trusted... sometimes when we say 'i gota go to church'... maybe sometimes we regret... 'aiyah got church lah..' when this has become a habit... it'd lose the meaning.......

3rdly, we are HIS because we are forgiven... tho our sins are unforgivable, unmeasurable, uncountable..., he DIED for us already... rev John said that he has been christian like me... (born to christian family) n he alwiz fell asleep during sermons (me again) coz sermons alwiz teach us to be good, to be free from sins... (all the things I HAVE KNOWN for ages)... yupz... but then.. his preacher asked 'do u know why jesus died for you? it is for us to be SAVED..... again.. imagine if today's the judgement day....

it is written in the bible that when judgement day comes, it is not ONLY our deeds are judged, but also our gifts and talents that he's given us... do we use it well, do we IMPROVE it.. do we juz sit there n KNOW ive got talents and gifts but never care to use it.... (me again -_-')..... this time really.. i do FEEL slapped real hard.... new year's eve i made 'commitment' this new year, i wanna do someting for Him... what hav i done????!!!!!!

now i really do want to be involved in church..... but how???!!! i am weak.. i am easily tempted.. i am LAZY.. i need something for me to hold on to... i need something for me to CHOOSE either-or activities... yesterday i met Rita n Vincent... i do envy them... their church activity is on saturday.. itz a weekend... a day where you wld juz want to slack after a week of activities.. but yupz.. they are faithful... they're devoted, but not fanatists..... will i be like them one day?? im no kid anymore.. i noe which is right n wrong, which is useful or not.. but sometimes juz cant help it.. human nature shouts more than holy spirit... *sigh* Help me God.... this is my prayer to you... 'draw me to your friendship circle, i want to surrender to you gladly... and please forgive me for trying to be 'good enough' to you, for alwiz trying to take control of my life...'

here's a song that the choir sang juz now... itz sooo nice... :D

THOUGH YOUR SINS BE AS SCARLET

It matters not where you have been

It matters not where you have done

There is cleansing from every sin,

In the blood of God's own Son.

Though your sins be as scarlet, they shall be as wool

Though they be red as crimson,

they shall be white as snow.

I know a fount where sins are washed away,

I know a place where night is turned to day;

Burdens are liften, and blind eyes made to see,

There's a wonder working power in the blood of Calvary.

Come be washed in the blood of the Lamb

Are you washed in the blood of the Lamb?